Know your Toons
by BuddyJack
Summary: Come on in to know more about your favorite cartoon characters. Oh, and one more thing: be sure to have an inhaler before you die of laughter after this.
1. Part 1

Know your stars… Know your stars… Know your stars…

1st victim

Mickey Mouse

Voice: Mickey Mouse, he's actually a hamster.

Mickey: What? I am most certainly not a hamster.

Voice: Mickey Mouse, he eats ducks including Donald.

Mickey: What? I wouldn't eat anybody, not even some one who is my best pal.

Voice: Mickey you cannibal.

Mickey: I'm serious!

Voice: Mickey Mouse, he eats ducks except for Daisy because he has a crush on her.

Mickey: Why you! I'm in love with Minnie. Daisy and I are just close friends.

Voice: Mickey Mouse, he once stole the scythe from the Reapers.

Mickey: What? I would never steal anything from anybody none what so ever, not even someone's family position.

Voice: Now you know Mickey Mouse the duck eating, Daisy loving, family position stealing hamster.

Mickey: No they don't! I'm a mouse not a hamster, and I don't eat ducks that's discussing. Further more: I'm in love with Minnie, Daisy and I are just friends, and I never stole anything from anybody, not even the Reapers.

2nd victim

Winnie Rover

Voice: Winnie, she's half human half rabbit.

Winnie: What? I'm not half rabbit I'm half wolf. My ears are too short, my teeth are too sharp, and my tail is too long for me to be half rabbit you moron.

Voice: Winnie, she hates her friends from Grimwood's school.

Winnie: No, I love my friends.

Voice: Winnie, she has a crush on May's little brother Max.

Winnie: How did you… I mean… Hey shut up!

Voice: Winnie, she launched nuclear missiles to Spongebob's house.

Winnie: What? I didn't do that!

Voice: Now you know Winnie the friend hating, Max loving, nuke missile launching were-rabbit.

Winnie: No they don't! I'm a were-wolf, I love my friends, I didn't launch any nukes, and don't say that I have a crush on Max!

3rd victim

Grim Jr. Reaper

Voice: Grim Jr., he's from the underwear.

Grim Jr.: What? I'm from the underworld. What kind of place would have a name like underwear?

Voice: Grim Jr., he thinks his dad is a moron.

Grim Jr.: What? Nobody dares says that my dad is a moron and I never call him that!

Voice: Grim Jr., he hates Minnie-Mandy because he thinks that she's a worthless rage doll.

Grim Jr.: Hey I love my sister. She and I… did you just call her a worthless rage doll?

Voice: Grim Jr., he's as ugly as his mom.

Grim Jr.: Did you just said that my mom is ugly? I can't believe that you just insulted my family!

Voice: Now you know Grim Jr. the sister hating son of a moron that's as ugly as his mom from the underwear.

Grim Jr.: No they don't! I'm from the underworld, my dad is not a moron, I love my sister and she's not worthless, and my mom is beautiful, and for your information: the girls dig me.

4th victim

James P. "Sully" Sullivan

Voice: Sully, he once locked Mike in the trunk of his own car.

Sully: I did what? I would never do that to my best friend at all.

Voice: Then where is he?

Sully: He's with the car at the gas station.

Voice: Sully, he just admitted that he locked his friend in the trunk of his car.

Sully: What? I said he's with the car at the gas station!

Voice: Sully, he went on a date with Celia.

Sully: Hey I would never plot to steal Celia from Mike!

Voice: Sully, he once putted glue in his mouth.

Sully: That was a dare the time I did that and I'm so going to kill Wario for making me do that.

Voice: Sully, he said that he's going to comet a murder on Wario.

Sully: What? I said that I'm going to kill him!

Voice: See?

Sully: Why you!

Voice: Now you know Sully the friend kidnapping, girlfriend stealing, glue eating murderer.

Sully: No they don't! Mike is my best friend and I would never lock him in the trunk of his car or steal his girlfriend Celia. And the glue eating moment was a dare that Wario got me into, and I didn't meant kill him literally.

5th victim

Squidward Tentacles

Voice: Spuidward, he once killed Mr. Krabs.

Squidward: What? I did nothing of a sort.

Voice: Squidward, he once stole Amy's diary and read it.

Squidward: Are you accusing me of something's I didn't do at all?

Voice: Squidward, He's an artist.

Squidward: That's much better.

Voice: An artist of crime.

Squidward: What? Why you filthy ling….

Voice: Squidward, he went and terrorized Toontown by setting up acme pie bombs.

Squidward: That was not terrorism that was an accident when I gave Spongebob a pie and I didn't know it was a bomb!

Voice: Now you know Squidward the crab killing, diary stealing, town bombing crime artist.

Squidward: No they don't! I never killed Mr. Krabs, I did not steal anyone's diary, not even Amy's. I also did not terrorize Toontown with pie bombs, and I'm not an artist of crime!


	2. Part 2

Know your stars… Know your stars… Know your stars…

Know your stars… Know your stars… Know your stars…

6th victim

Bob "Mr. Incredible" Parr

Voice: Mr. Incredible, he's a super villain.

Mr. Incredible: What?! I'm a super hero not a super villain.

Voice: Then how do you explain the time you bombed Callaway's military school and Grimwood's ghoul school?

Mr. Incredible: I didn't do anything like that!

Voice: Mr. Incredible, he ate a bowl of ants for breakfast.

Mr. Incredible: That's discussing! Why would I eat ants?!

Voice: Mr. Incredible, his power is cry baby attack.

Mr. Incredible: Why you! Nobody calls Mr. Incredible a cry baby!

Voice: Now you know Mr. Incredible the school bombing, ant eating, super villainous cry baby.

Mr. Incredible: No they don't! I don't eat ants, I never bombed any school, I'm a super hero, and stop calling me a cry baby!

7th victim

Amy Rose

Voice: Amy, she has a collection merchandise of Bowser.

Amy: What?! Hey I have a collection merchandise of Sonic and I hate Bowser.

Voice: Amy, she destroyed the Fenton's house.

Amy: What?! I didn't do that!

Voice: Amy, she thinks Tails is a wimp.

Amy: Hey I didn't say anything like that!

Voice: Amy, she baths in mud.

Amy: Gross! Why are you so mean?!

Voice: Now you know Amy the house destroying, Tails hating, mud bathing Bowser fan.

Amy: No they don't! I never destroyed anyone's house, I don't think Tails is a wimp, I don't bath in mud, and I am not a Bowser fan!

8th victim

Shrek

Voice: Shrek, he's a troll.

Shrek: No, I'm an ogre.

Voice: Shrek, he once strapped Zelda on a chair and pushed her in a volcano.

Shrek: What?! I would never do anything like that!

Voice: Shrek, he once wore a tutu at the high school dance.

Shrek: What the?! I never wore a tutu!

Voice: Shrek, he's the one who said that Grim Jr.'s mom is ugly.

Shrek: Now you're framing me?!

Voice: Now you know Shrek the tutu wearing, princess frying, family insulting troll.

Shrek: No they don't! I never strapped Zelda on a chair and pushed her in a volcano and I did not wear a tutu at the high school dance! Also, you're the one who said that Mrs. Reaper is ugly, and I'm an ogre not a troll, can't you tell the difference?!

9th victim

Kazooie

Voice: Kazooie, she's a blue feathered bird.

Kazooie: No you moron, my feathers are red trim in yellow.

Voice: Kazooie, she set Mickey's house on fire.

Kazooie: What?! That is a great big lie!

Voice: Kazooie, she's married to a carrot.

Kazooie: Excuses me? Why would I marry a carrot?

Voice: Kazooie, she loves to eat stink bugs.

Kazooie: Yuck! That is really something that I would never do even if it's a dare!

Voice: Now you know Kazooie the carrot marrying, house burning, stink bug eating blue feathered bird.

Kazooie: No they don't! I didn't set anybody's house on fire, I didn't marry a carrot, I don't eat stink bugs, and my feathers are red and yellow you color blind moron!

10th victim

Jimmy Neutron

Voice: Jimmy, he always gets a D-.

Jimmy: What?! Hey I'm the smartest kid in my school and I always get an A+.

Voice: Jimmy, he pushed Cybella and Tug in a poll of piranha while they were on a date. Luckily they survived.

Jimmy: What?! I never did anything like that!

Voice: Jimmy, he strapped Mickey and Mario on a rocket and launched them to Mars.

Jimmy: I never did that either!

Voice: As if you launching Grim Jr. and Minnie-Mandy to Venus wasn't bad enough.

Jimmy: That dose it! If you say another lie about me again…!

Voice: Jimmy, he and Cindy are a couple.

Jimmy: "Drat!" That's it! I can't take this anymore!

Voice: Now you know Jimmy the person launching, piranha feeding, Cindy loving, D- student.

Jimmy: No they don't! I always get an A, I didn't launch anybody in space, I did not push anybody in a pool of piranha, and Cindy and I are not a couple!


	3. Part 3

Know your stars… Know your stars… Know your stars

11th victim

Anti-Cosmo

Voice: Anti-Cosmo, he's a genie.

Anti-Cosmo: I beg your pardon, but I'm an anti-fairy, not a genie.

Voice: Anti-Cosmo, he went and put spiders on Kairi's bed.

Anti-Cosmo: What?! I never did that! Although that is a pretty good idea...

Voice: Anti-Cosmo, He likes to wear wet gym socks on his head.

Anti-Cosmo: How dare you say that I do something so disgusting!!!

Voice: Anti-Cosmo, He loves to eat hairballs barfed from cats.

Anti-Cosmo: Why you ingrate, immature...!!!

Voice: Now you know Anti-Cosmo the gym sock wearing, hairball eating, spider bed spreading genie.

Anti-Cosmo: No they don't! I did not put any spiders on anybodies bed, I also don't eat hairballs, or wear gym socks over my head, and if I were a genie, I would grant your wish in a bad way!

12th victim

Max Maple

Voice: Max, he's a plumber

Max: Say what? I'm a Pokemon Biology student.

Voice: Max, he once flooded the Mario Bros. house.

Max: What?! I didn't did anything like that!

Voice: Max, he thinks Cream the rabbit is hot.

Max: Sure she's cute, but I think Winnie Rover is hotter... I mean... who are we talking about?

Voice: Max, he went and messed up May's room.

Max: What?! I would never go and mess with my big sister's stuff, even if I wanted to!

Voice: Now you know Max the house flooding, room destroying, rabbit loving plumber.

Max: No they don't! I'm a Pokemon Biology student! I never made May's room a mess, and I didn't flood Mario and Luigi's house, and I'm in love with Winnie! I mean... I like Cream and Winnie both the same, like friends...

13th victim

Toph

Voice: Toph, she's a water-bender.

Toph: I think you got me mixed up with Katara, I'm an earth-bender.

Voice: Toph, she once caused an earthquake at Toontown.

Toph: What?! Look, buster! I would never cause an earthquake at where living things are!

Voice: Toph, she poured snail slime on Sandy's clothes.

Toph: Excuse me?! If you insulate me one more time...!

Voice: Toph, she has a secret love for Aang.

Toph: Oh, you are so going to wish that you hadn't said that!!

Voice: Now you know Toph the earthquake causing, slime pouring, water bending Aang lover.

Toph: No they don't! I am an earth-bender, and I didn't use it to cause any earthquakes! I also did not pour snail slime on anyone's clothes, and I am not in love with Twinkle-toes!

14th victim

Lightning McQueen

Voice: Lightning, He's a boat.

Lightning: Ha ha, Uh... no, I'm a race car, and a famous one too.

Voice: Lightning, he ran over Pikachu.

Lightning: What?! I would never run over any living thing! Despite Red's flowers...

Voice: Lightning, he pushed Manny and Frida off a cliff.

Lightning: Did what?! I didn't push anybody off of anything!

Voice: Lightning, he oncebroke up with Sally.

Lightning: Hey, what makes you say that I dumped Sally?!

Voice: Now you Know Lightning the Pikachu killing, person pusher, Sally hating boat.

Lightning: No they don't! I'm a race car, I did not ran over any animal, or push anybody off a cliff, and I'm too much in love with Sally too brake up with her!

15th victim

Frida Suarez

Voice: Frida, she plays the blues.

Frida: Uh... actually, I play Rock-n-Roll songs, but I like the blues too.

Voice: Frida, she stole Yugi's card deck.

Frida: What?! I did stole any cool guy's card deck! I want to though...

Voice: Frida, she destroyed Olimar's space ship.

Frida: Hey, don't make me go and get Manny to come and beat you up!

Voice: Frida, she has a crush on Manny.

Frida: ... Why I oughta...! Manny and I are just friends... just plain friends!

Voice: Now you know Frida the card deck stealing, space ship destroying, Manny loving blues player.

Frida: No they don't! I play Rock-n-Roll, I didn't steal any card deck, I didn't destroy any ship, and Manny and I are just friends! You know, Right when you get to the 30th victim, me along with everybody you insulted and their friends and families will form an angry mob and come after you, whoever you are! You hear?!


End file.
